Funeral

Writing Challenge: Jan 17, 2018

Prompt: Write about a funeral from the dead person’s perspective

I should have taken the time to plan my own funeral. Watching this memorial service is like watching a train-wreck.

 

Granted, I’m dead. I really shouldn’t care- but really? They put me in THAT? I never wore that outfit in life- why would you think I’d want my body in it for time and all eternity? At least the casket is nice.

 

Ugh! They chose THAT picture? Of all the pictures you people have of me, you choose the one that makes me look like a blotted, sunburned chick monk? If I wasn’t already dead, I’d ask someone to kill me now.

 

Everyone is so sad. Am I a horrible person for being happy about that… am I still a person? Does it matter? I guess not- still, I feel bad that I don’t feel bad that everyone is crying. As a ghost, or a spirit, or a presence- whatever I am- I’m glad that my family and friends miss me. Maybe I should try to comfort them or something.

 

Huh. You know, you would think I was a nice person from what people are saying about me. No one wants to say anything bad about the dead-person. I should have died sooner. I’ve suddenly become a very popular person. Don’t worry everyone- you’ll remember how annoying I was soon enough. Maybe you won’t be so sad.

 

No headstone yet. I’ll have to come back and check it out later… I guess it does take awhile to carve it. It’s a nice enough cemetery I guess. I should have requested cremation though- the idea of my body just rotting away is a little unsettling. At least cremation is quick.

GOD! This priest just drowns on and on and on! I’m bored to death! Ha, bored to death…. Death jokes are a lot funnier when you’ve already died.

 

Okay- the crane is lowering me down now. Everyone is dropping a handful of dirt over me. God this is so sad. Before it was kind of funny- unreal- but now- now they are starting to leave. One by one they drop tears and dirt into my open grave. Please don’t cry- now it hurts. I don’t want to be sad anymore. They are walking away. Don’t go yet! Please, don’t leave… I want to say goodbye.

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