I collect hobbies like trading cards. Relishing the thrill of the hunt for for a new pass time to expand my collection. I cycle through my passions like photos. Flipping through an album, never resting on one page longer than a beat. I hoard potential like a child hoards shells. Putting them on display or … Continue reading Hobby Collector
Most of my views come at 4:00am on Mondays. This makes perfect sense to me, because I too lay awake so deep into the night that the sky starts to lighten with the approaching dawn. Those hours, after the calendar date changes at midnight but before the sunrises exists outside of time. This is doubly … Continue reading The Time In Between
A friend of mine told me that she thinks she is boring. I was confused when she made this confession to me. She's smart, funny, adventurous, well-traveled, and can really hold her known in any conversation. How could she think she was boring. When I asked for clarification she told me; "I don't have all … Continue reading Boring Isn’t Bad: a defense of boring.
Felicie ran until she was well out of sight of the cottage. Finding herself alone, overwhelmed, and exhausted, she threw herself down on the ground next to a tree, and cried herself out. How could her brothers think about leaving her? How could they put themselves in such danger? How could they do this to … Continue reading The Curse of 13: A 12 Brother’s Retelling part 8
The winter sky is white As the milky waters of Lethe. The stark clouds blend into a horizon: No beginning and no end, Like oblivion. The impervious sky, The impersonal snow, Blur the lines of heaven and earth. A void without warmth. A void without memory. A void without emotion. Only the bliss of nothingness.
I've always been afraid of wanting too much. I became convinced that if I told myself I don't want it (whatever "it" is), it wouldn't hurt when it was denied. I never believed it was "all or nothing". Rather, I believed that it was "small or nothing". I became content with scraps of affection, moments … Continue reading Anxious Expectations: Afraid of Wanting Too Much
The cold moon rises in a lifeless sky. Silver as the winter, Bright as a midnight sun, Shattering the darkness. Snow illuminates the landscape. A reflection of a reflection, A false dawn? Or heaven’s mercy on an endless night?
This December has been one of the coldest of my life. I've been in Utah for 14 years, but as Utah has been in a drought for just as long. My first winter in the Rockies was filled with ice and snow, but each consecutive year the snow came later and later. Many years we … Continue reading Winter Wonderland: Cold December
I have never been a fan of the cold. Growing up in Southeast Texas, cold wasn't something I encountered very often. The few occasions when the thermometer dropped below freezing were rare and therefore exciting. The fantasy of building snowmen or having a "white Christmas" were just that, fantasies. Until I moved to Utah and … Continue reading Learning to Love Winter
Sometimes, out of no where, I want to cry. Not because I'm sad or because anything is wrong. Not because I'm so happy that I'm overcome, but just because it feels like something is building up inside and needs to be released. In those moments, which occur in calm moments, the tears don't come. Though … Continue reading Releasing Who I Was: crying for who I was, am, and could be