Bringing Mae Flowers

My hobby is collecting hobbies.

It’s a trait I picked up from my Grandfather whose illustrious list of hobbies include: volunteer park ranger, figurine painter, story-teller, computer gamer, wood carver, chili cook, greeting card designer, Spanish learner… the list goes on. When describing my grandfather, the phrase “Jack of all trades, master of none” comes to mind. Each new pastime is approached with the same level of enthusiasm, though the skill and duration in which he pursues them varies.

As long as I can remember, I have always been the same way.

Some children know what they want to be from the moment they are old enough to speak, but I only knew what I wanted to do. And that was everything. I wanted to write and research, explore and experiment, design and create, to teach and learn. I never wanted to be limited to just one “thing”, but I felt like I had to. We are pressured from a young age to choose a career path and work toward it. We are defined by that career for the rest of our lives, and on the occasions we are asked “what we like to do” and are expected to answer with just 1 or 2 activities. I always felt like I was too scattered, or even too selfish, for wanting more than that.

Some are praised for this trait, and some are condemned.

Famous names like Leonardo Di Vinci, Maya Angelou, and Benjamin Franklin are held up as inspirational figures in history and culture. Even mythical gods like Hermes and Athena are known for their many talents- so why is the common dabbler looked down on? How many times have you heard someone tell a college student to “just choose a major!”, or “Grow up and get a job!”. We tolerate children experimenting with hobbies, but start pressuring teenagers to start figuring out their life plan. If you haven’t figured it out by 25, you are already seen as “immature and indecisive” at best, and a “disappointing failure”at worst.

Anything that doesn’t make you money is seen as a waste of time.

If you can’t do something well enough to turn a coin- you shouldn’t do it at all. People will say that you should “follow your dreams” or “pursue your passions”, but no one actually believes that. The reality is that we are expected to live to work. If you are lucky, you might find your job to be fulfilling, or you might be able to make your favorite hobby into a “side hustle”, but very few can devote much time to their passion -nevertheless multiple passions. In that sense, I think there is a sense of jealousy aimed at people who can and do. In a society where time is money, and social media is constantly bombarding you with people who are “better” at something than you, there’s something inspirational and vaguely threatening about someone who does what they love anyway.

Maybe I am just scattered.

Maybe I am mistaking distraction with inspiration and enthusiasm for talent. But I don’t think that’s it. I’ll be the first to admit that I am not “great” at anything. I’m not the best writer or painter, perfumer or soaper, linguist, cook, or hiker. I’m mediocre at a lot of things, good at some, and downright bad at others. But I keep doing them anyway, because I can’t imagine not. Who would I be if not an amature, hobbyist, and dabbler? If I listened to the advice given to be all throughout school, would I be happier? If I choose a single path, if I mastered a single art, would I feel fulfilled? Or would I be as I have always been- hungry for more.