I am in a rut. Everything is going fine: I still like my job, I still have great friends, and I even got to spend time with my little brothers who came to Utah for a visit. In fact, everything had been running so smoothly I didn't even notice the depression sneaking in until I … Continue reading Depressive Rut: How Am I Working Through It
I know I'm not the only person who's been in this position, and maybe you are reading this because you're here too. Basically, I am doing great; I finished school, have settled into a job I enjoy, I have a beautiful place to live, and wonderful friends. I have every reason to be happy- but … Continue reading Things Are Going Well, So Why Aren’t I Happy?
The last few weeks I've been restless and unsettled. On the whole, things are looking good. I'm doing well in my final semester of school. I've started dating with some regularity, and I've even started a new job that pays much better than my last one. Despite all of that, or maybe because of it, … Continue reading Restless: Life with high functioning anxiety
A Quick Word on the Post-Holiday Crash: Something about the holidays leaves us feeling drained and depressed. I suspect these feelings have something to do with how much time, money, and energy we expend trying to make these arbitrary dates "special" or "meaningful" only to end up feel let down when the days come and … Continue reading Post Holiday Crash and the Final Semester
Christmas has come and gone in an almost uneventful way. The tree was lite, the presents wrapped, and stockings hung- but the joy just wasn't there. The dull browns, the dark days, the cold weather- something about it saps all my energy. It brings out all the sadness, the despair, and hopelessness. It's as if … Continue reading S.A.D: realities of depressive disorders
If you've been following my blog, you know that I've been very open about my mental illness and the journey I am taking toward mental health. In my last post about my mental health journey I mentioned how I've basically had some sort of major break-through in nearly every session after my second appointment. Once … Continue reading Epiphany
*Brief mentions of trauma, abuse, and sexual assault* I've tried therapy several times in the past, but I've always ended up giving up before I make any progress. There are several reasons for this: I wasn't ready yet, I couldn't afford it, I felt like it was a waste of time, it was too hard... … Continue reading Fourth Session
FMLA is over, and work has begun again. I've forgotten just how exhausting working and going to school full-time is. I have classes from 12 pm to 4 pm, then work from 4:15 pm to 1:15 am and try to get homework done before and in-between. I knew that this insane work, work, work schedule … Continue reading Finals, Work, and Therapy