I finally had the anxiety attack I had been expecting. With a global pandemic, an economic crisis, and a flood in my apartment, I am surprised I didn't have a breakdown sooner. Those of you who follow my blog know that I have generalized anxiety disorder, which can (an has) triggered my depression, cPTSD, and … Continue reading Progress Isn’t Linear
I have depression as well as Seasonal Affective Disorder. If you've been following my blog for awhile, I've mentioned both several times. The way my usual depression differs from S.A.D. is in it's intensity. My depression is like allergies: annoying, always present, and occasionally has a huge flare up before dying back down to general … Continue reading Week Off: Dealing with S.A.D.
I grew up on the coastal plains of Texas, where hot summer storms made music on our metal roof. I have many memories of sitting on our large front deck watching sheets of water fall front the sky, flooding the spongy ground with large puddles of water, and filling the air with that sweet smell … Continue reading It Rained
I know I'm not the only person who's been in this position, and maybe you are reading this because you're here too. Basically, I am doing great; I finished school, have settled into a job I enjoy, I have a beautiful place to live, and wonderful friends. I have every reason to be happy- but … Continue reading Things Are Going Well, So Why Aren’t I Happy?
Winter is done. Let's enjoy the sun: Yes, this title is a pun. Winter is finally over, the weather is warming up, and the snow has finally stopped (except for the occasional snow flurry). Utah's weather being as unpredictable as it gets, we have rain, sleet, sun, and snow all in one day during spring. … Continue reading Spring Into Step: My Spring Action Guide
Better Doesn't Mean "Good". I never really thought about it before, but somewhere along the way we started to equate "better" with "good". But, "better" and "good" aren't the same thing. We know that, yet how often we tell our sick friends and family "get better soon!" Obviously we want our loved ones to feel … Continue reading What “Better” Means
What is Mindfulness? First, we should address the fact that "mindfulness" isn't a new concept. Whether you realize it or not, you've practiced it at some point in your life. Psychologists, religious leaders, personal gurus, and your hippie neighbor next-door have been spouting the benefits of mindfulness for millennia. Mindfulness goes by many names: awareness, … Continue reading Mindfulness To Me In 2019
The last few weeks I've been restless and unsettled. On the whole, things are looking good. I'm doing well in my final semester of school. I've started dating with some regularity, and I've even started a new job that pays much better than my last one. Despite all of that, or maybe because of it, … Continue reading Restless: Life with high functioning anxiety
A Quick Word on the Post-Holiday Crash: Something about the holidays leaves us feeling drained and depressed. I suspect these feelings have something to do with how much time, money, and energy we expend trying to make these arbitrary dates "special" or "meaningful" only to end up feel let down when the days come and … Continue reading Post Holiday Crash and the Final Semester
Christmas has come and gone in an almost uneventful way. The tree was lite, the presents wrapped, and stockings hung- but the joy just wasn't there. The dull browns, the dark days, the cold weather- something about it saps all my energy. It brings out all the sadness, the despair, and hopelessness. It's as if … Continue reading S.A.D: realities of depressive disorders