Christmas has come and gone in an almost uneventful way. The tree was lite, the presents wrapped, and stockings hung- but the joy just wasn't there. The dull browns, the dark days, the cold weather- something about it saps all my energy. It brings out all the sadness, the despair, and hopelessness. It's as if … Continue reading S.A.D: realities of depressive disorders
Brown Christmas
It never snowed on Christmas in Houston. Growing up, the December was always nippy- the browning grass was crisp with frost. Our breath rose in puffs before our faces- but snow never fell on Christmas day. I didn't mind that Christmas's weren't snowy. We had everything we really needed. Stocking hung in front of … Continue reading Brown Christmas
My Magic Birthday Comet
If there was ever a time to believe in magic, it would be tonight. Today, I turned 25 years old, and tonight is the night of the Christmas Comet. I've always looked for the mystical and fantastical in small things. Little bits of luck, coincidence, and beauty in the every-day always felt like more. I … Continue reading My Magic Birthday Comet
Epiphany
If you've been following my blog, you know that I've been very open about my mental illness and the journey I am taking toward mental health. In my last post about my mental health journey I mentioned how I've basically had some sort of major break-through in nearly every session after my second appointment. Once … Continue reading Epiphany
Finals Week
*to the tune of Jingle-Bells* Headed out to school I'm already real late. Then I take a look outside- it's snowing- that's just great. My car's covered in ice. The road hasn't be plowed. I'm tired, I'm stressed, it's finals week- and I should be in class now. Oh, Finals week, finals week- … Continue reading Finals Week
Fourth Session
*Brief mentions of trauma, abuse, and sexual assault* I've tried therapy several times in the past, but I've always ended up giving up before I make any progress. There are several reasons for this: I wasn't ready yet, I couldn't afford it, I felt like it was a waste of time, it was too hard... … Continue reading Fourth Session
Magic
Writing Challenge: Oct 29, 2018 Prompt: Write about magic Magic isn’t about being otherworldly: it’s about tuning into the world. It isn’t about manipulating the universe: It’s about understanding it. It isn’t about big, grandiose things, but about small, inconsequential ones. True magic is subtle, almost undetectable. It's in tiniest coincidences, occurrences, and gestures that … Continue reading Magic
Finals, Work, and Therapy
FMLA is over, and work has begun again. I've forgotten just how exhausting working and going to school full-time is. I have classes from 12 pm to 4 pm, then work from 4:15 pm to 1:15 am and try to get homework done before and in-between. I knew that this insane work, work, work schedule … Continue reading Finals, Work, and Therapy
Dream Life-Style
Writing Challenge: Nov 15, 2018 Prompt Inspiration: Describe your dream life-style. I dream of stability and contentment rather than high-stakes, fast-paced success. Two decades of constant inconsistency has increased by appreciation of the simple life too many take for granted. I want to live in one home for more than a year. I want place … Continue reading Dream Life-Style
Sleeping Troubles
It's been awhile since I checked in with you, and here's why- I'm having trouble sleeping. Part of this is because I'm on the couch until my room is finished with it's construction (mold+leaky pipe+cracked foundation = bad times), another part of it is my needy kitty demanding love and attention at 7am when I … Continue reading Sleeping Troubles
