Bringing Mae Flowers

There’s a Book Series I really Enjoy called “Before the Coffee Gets Cold”

This modern urban fantasy is about a tiny cafe in Japan with the unique ability to send a drinker back to the past for a short period of time- the length of time it takes for a cup of coffee to get cold. There are many rules that the traveler must follow, the first one of which being that no matter what you say or do, the present won’t change.

What does this have to do with giving advice to my teenage self?

As I’ve been reading (and crying over) this series, I’ve found myself wondering if I could go back in time, would I do it? Knowing that the present will not change, knowing that there’s a possibility that the person I meet may not believe me. If I still chose to go back in time, who would I see and what would I say? The obvious choice was to see the best friend who passed away, or someone I drifted apart from- but then another possibility came to me:

What if I had 15 minutes to meet with my younger self?

I would tell myself to keep trying, things will get better. I would tell myself to keep moving, because I will eventually find my way. I would tell myself that I am stronger than I think I am, and that asking for help and support isn’t a sign of weakness. I would tell myself to be kinder to myself, and that my best is good enough. Finally, I would tell myself that life won’t turn out the way I thought it would, and that’s okay. Instead, my life turned out even better than I could have imagined.

Would I change the past if I could?

It’s something I have been thinking about a lot: what do I regret? What would I change about my past if I could? Would I do anything differently? The conclusion I came to is that I wouldn’t change much at all. I made a lot of mistakes and did things that I’m not proud of, but those choices I made helped shape me into who I am today. Even if I could change the past, what good would it do? In a scenerio in which my actions could change the present, I may end up making things worse than they were, and in a case where I couldn’t change the present, it would be a waste of time. Instead of dwelling on what I did wrong, I think it’s more productive to focus on how I could be better. Instead of making changes, I would offer encouragement.

Would I take my own advice?

If I found that cafe and went back in time, would I listen to myself? I don’t know if I would. Firstly, I am a skeptical person, so I wouldn’t believe that I am myself from the future. Assuming I do believe myself, or I pretended to be a friendly stranger, and I managed to relay my message, would I take the advice? I think I would. If anything, it would confirm what I already believed, that I could change my life. Even at my lowest, when everything seemed hopeless and pointless, something inside me refused to give up. I couldn’t always see a bright future, or happiness, but I always hoped that it was there. If I had 15 minutes to tell my 15 year old self anything I would tell her that I was right, and that I should never let myself believe otherwise.